< 1 minute read Okay, we get it – you’re amazing at batting. It’s getting a bit old now. This wasn’t Michael Clarke’s first double hundred of the year. It wasn’t even his first double hundred of the year in Adelaide; it was his second, and he has four of the buggers in total.
Continue readingTag: Michael Clarke
Michael Clarke ain’t all that
< 1 minute read A lot of people are backtracking on Michael Clarke’s captaincy. He was astonishingly unpopular when he got the job – largely on the grounds that he looks like he drinks Smirnoff Ice – but many Australians seem to have warmed to him, what with all the wins and all. On
Continue readingMichael Clarke’s support for Mitchell Johnson is getting ridiculous
< 1 minute read Michael Clarke concluded early on in his tenure that his man management of Mitchell Johnson would involve unconditional love, no matter what the tufty-haired purveyor of left-arm ineptitude did with the ball. Johnson hasn’t taken many wickets recently, but Clarke’s been steadfast in his support. Someone should tell him he
Continue readingDue a big score, due a hundred
< 1 minute read We’ve written about batsmen being ‘due’ a score before. The idea is that if a batsman isn’t scoring any runs, he’s actually stockpiling them for a future innings. The idea seems to be that every batsman has a quota of runs that he can allocate as he chooses. A terrible
Continue readingThe five best batsmen over the next five years
< 1 minute read The big names are generally old bastards. Who’s next? Ross Taylor, New Zealand, age 25 Ross Taylor tends to look like he’s the man who’s going to win the match for New Zealand shortly before doing something slightly spacky. Pretty soon those fifties will become hundreds and those hundreds will
Continue readingAshes players to watch tomorrow
2 minute read You might have noticed a certain jaded world-weariness about our recent Ashes coverage as a result of mindless media coverage smotheration. It feels right that we should return to our natural demeanour at a time when everyone else is bouncing about like there’s a lot of bouncing to be done
Continue readingSimon Katich grabs Michael Clarke by the throat
< 1 minute read Simon Katich went for Michael Clarke in the dressing rooms after Australia beat South Africa at the SCG last month. You can’t blame him. If we were in the same team as Michael Clarke, we’d probably have drawn up some sort of schedule as to which days we were going
Continue readingMichael Clarke is a proper batsman
< 1 minute read Michael Clarke and Ian Bell. Two munchkin-faced, thimble-sized men who’ve made knowledgeable cricket folk go all quivery with their batsmanship. They’re much the same age and apparently both have “natural talent” instead of a skeleton. However, one’s dithering along the same as he always has done, while the other’s a
Continue readingWhy Andrew Symonds fell out with Michael Clarke
< 1 minute read Andrew Symonds said: “I did something silly with him one night and I suppose I was a bit disrespectful to him.” What does that sound like to you? It sounds like it could only be one thing to us. What act is both silly and disrespectful? Ask yourself that. It
Continue readingMichael Clarke does some sort of deal with the devil
< 1 minute read He must have sold something to Satan to take three wickets in the penultimate over to win this Test for Australia. It can’t have been his soul though, because he must have already sold that to Ricky Ponting to bring him on to bowl in the first place. Maybe it
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