The three silliest things Andrew McDonald said about Pat Cummins this week

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Look, every publication’s got its own way of covering Pat Cummins’ back injury and its possible impact on his participation in the Ashes. This is ours. (For what it’s worth, we have long suspected that for all the column inches devoted to them both, Cummins and Ben Stokes won’t be as central this series as is being widely assumed.)

Pat Cummins has back-knack and Australia coach Andrew McDonald said some things about it earlier this week. These are our top three favourite things that he said. (He didn’t actually say a great deal, so these comments aren’t spectacular, but each of them in some way or other amused us.)

3. “We look forward to our captain taking a significant part in The Ashes”

We like the corporate press release quality of this comment, particularly as its allied with a hope so basic and fundamental that it shouldn’t really need remarking on. What McDonald is essentially saying here is, “We hope our Ashes captain plays in the Ashes,” and he is saying this with just a soupcon of subtext that reads, “obviously he won’t play every game, but we hope he can get through, what, three Tests?”

2. “It was a routine scan on the back of the West Indies”

This one reads so ambiguously out of context. You scanned what, Ronnie? The West Indies’ back? Why did you do that? What’s that got to do with anything? Why didn’t you scan Cummins’ back if that’s the one you’re worried about. McDonald of course means ‘off the back of’ in the sense of ‘as a result of’ while ‘the West Indies’ is short for ‘our recent tour of the West Indies’. But why word it like that? This is better.

1. “We’re confident that he’s going to partake in the Ashes”

No explanation needed. Do you want to take part in the Ashes? “Ooh, I reckon I could be tempted. I don’t want to really overdo it or anything, but I might partake.”