King Cricket

May 2, 2009 County cricket / England

Rob Key – England opening batsman

< 1 minute readJust imagine the match announcer saying: “Opening the batting for England: Robert Key and someone else.” Because that’s what they’d say. They wouldn’t name the second batsman, because there would be NO POINT. The announcer has already given you all the information you could ever need: It’s England and it’s

May 2, 2009 Extras

Cricket headlines with puns in them

< 1 minute readThere’s a brilliant pun-based board game from the Eighties called You Must Be Joking which must be adored by cricket headline writers. Those guys just can’t let a pun pass them by. We describe that game as ‘brilliant’, but actually it was anything but. The full title was You Must

May 1, 2009 England

Ravi Bopara: England number three

< 1 minute readWe like it. Let’s put some mundane banalities into bullet point format to in no way support that. Ravi Bopara Proper batsman who bats at three for his county One of the few batsmen in county cricket who you could consider to have been exceptional over the last few years

April 30, 2009 Extras

Bat For The Draw (Cricket Top Trumps)

< 1 minute readRemember Top Trumps? Course you do. Picking a category and hoping that the number on your card’s higher than the number on your opponent’s card. What could be more thrilling? We’ve got cricket Top Trumps on the site now. Repetitive and totally unsociable – it’s the perfect King Cricket game.

April 30, 2009 County cricket / England

Tim Bresnan being in the England squad

< 1 minute readRumours that we kidnapped Geoff Miller’s family and told him we were going to force them to watch Eastenders constantly until he picked Tim Bresnan for England are well wide of the mark. Clearly we told him to pick Rob Key and clearly he ignored us. We released the Miller

April 29, 2009 County cricket / England

Graham Onions celebrates

< 1 minute readGraham Onions was called into the England squad today and he’s celebrated in fine style. It’s been debated whether runs scored at Taunton count as much, being as the pitch is famously so generous to batsmen. If that’s the case, what are wickets worth? Presumably more. We’ve also argued that

April 29, 2009 Match report

Australian cricket match report

2 minute readPrice writes: Whilst on a recent jaunt to Australia to a wedding that didn’t happen, I decided to go watch some kind of Australian cricket, which was fraught with difficulty: Attempt 1 Having researched that there was cricket on my first day in Perth, I duly jetlagged my way through

April 28, 2009 Australia / County cricket

Phillip Hughes in England

< 1 minute readAfter scores of 118, 65 not out and 74 last week, today’s 99 not out marks the moment when we move away from admiring an exceptional young Antipodean talent and towards being sick to the back teeth, the front teeth and tonsils of a winnetty-faced, cork-hatted bastard. Phillip Hughes is

April 28, 2009 County cricket

Paul Horton’s first one-day hundred

< 1 minute readPakistan v Australia? The England Test squad? The IPL? No, we’re going to cover an early season one-day match between Lancashire and Northamptonshire that happened at the weekend and we’re going to cover it by saying ‘Paul Horton hit a hundred’ and nothing more. Paul Horton hit a hundred. Join

April 27, 2009 England

Michael Vaughan’s paint thing

< 1 minute readYou’ll have heard of Michael Vaughan’s ‘artballing’ by now. He throws, hits and bowls paint-covered cricket balls against a canvas and what results is branded ‘art’. Vaughan took this up as part of his winter getting away from cricket. We’re not entirely sure whether this really counts as ‘getting away